Posts tagged heart chakra
The Art of Consideration

We live in a world that seems to demand that we be focused on ourselves, our aspirations, and our development. And while that is all good – when focusing on these things gets out of balance, it can result in us becoming self-absorbed and loosing our consideration.

I have been incredibly fortunate to be surrounded by considerate people – my friends especially, are living embodiments of consideration. Take the one who showed up at my house with a birthday present in the midst of preparing for her wedding that was only a couple of days later or the one that got a healthy meal made for me when I was unwell during law school in the midst of her final exams.

These girls have been my inspiration.

The truth is that there is so much more to life than just yourself. And making the mental space for others and actively checking in and caring about others is how we should all exist as human beings. I believe the world functioned this way back in the older days, where a community based approach to living and watching out for your tribe was a natural way of being. Somehow, over time, society has become increasingly egocentric by placing people’s individual needs over the needs of others. This tendency may be allowing for an incredible amount of success, especially in one’s career life, but it’s poisoning relationships and making people forget that another person’s life is equally as important as their own – irrespective of race, class, gender, profession, or religious background.

I think that we each have so much to offer to others and that connecting with others, sharing ideas and helping is so important.

So it saddens me to see a culture where consideration is a somewhat rare trait. Where people don’t care about someone unless that someone is “of their own”. Where basic principles of being respectful and kind and reciprocating assistance is thrown out the window in favour of focusing on oneself. Where people expect for the world to bend for them but not the other way around.

Have we not failed as a society in inculcating good values if people are operating solely from their ego?

Consideration in Energy Healing
The energy center that speaks to how we relate to others is the sacral chakra. This energy center tends to have an over-active “yan” or masculine energy when one is self-focused or an over-active “yin” energy when one is overly focused on others. The key is for a healthy balance – one that allows you to progress forward personally but does not impact your consideration for others.

The heart chakra is the center of giving. An open heart gives and a closed one only receives.

A good energy healing session can restore balance to both these chakras.

To work on your consideration alongside energy healing, start off by checking in with other people, seeing how you can help, and taking out time everyday to do something for someone other than for yourself.

As Ellen Degeneres says, “be kind to one another” – always.

To the Bettys of This World

Okay – this one is for the ladies but men, feel free to substitute yourself in Betty’s place if you feel you can relate.

Back in the day when Archie Comics were a thing, who did you relate to? Was it Betty? Or Veronica?

I personally related to Betty and I still do. I remember complaining to my friends for years about being Betty, not Veronica, and most men not valuing that.

I also remember falling in love with Michael Vartan’s character in “Never Been Kissed” when he told Drew Barrymore’s character – a young, not so popular, sweet girl “I always liked Betty better”.

I’m sure any girl who identifies with Betty would swoon at the thought of a man loving the Betty in her. Betty was sweet, caring, down-to-earth and real.

Veronica was… legs… I mean don’t get me wrong – she had her moments, but she was super high maintenance and kind of superficial.

I have so many friends who have been rejected on the basis of their good “Betty character”. None of them expected being rejected for having values that they have paid attention to cultivating because they are genuinely committed to being good human beings. And that’s why it hurts them so much – because if someone doesn’t think you’re physically attractive it can certainly mess with your self-esteem but when the basis of rejection runs to the core of who you are, it just hurts on a whole other level.

So to those women who can relate and are still single and frustrated, I say this – say bye to the men who don’t value and appreciate you for who you are. Never change the Betty in you to please the man who expects a Veronica. And if a man finds your good character intimidating and runs for the hills – great – he’s not the right person for you.

I honestly believe that there’s no such thing as “the one” – don’t be discouraged if the person you thought was “the one” didn’t work out. The universe always sends soulmate relationships our way. These are relationships marked by a deep connection, mutual respect and appreciation. You should always choose someone who deserves you. And I mean that – it has to be someone who deserves you. This isn’t about being conceited – it’s about recognizing your own self worth and staying in your integrity!

Here are the energy centers you want to work on to overcome the damage from the Archies who choose the Veronicas over you:

1. Heart Chakra – self-love & appreciation.
2. Solar Plexus – self-esteem & self-respect.
3. Sacral Chakra – emotional balance

Oh and keep your heart open to the Archies in the form of forgiveness. Forgiveness doesn’t mean that what Archie did was okay – it just means that you’re willing to let go of any resentment that you hold against him. Because it’s such a waste of mental and emotional energy to invest in the vicious cycle of resentment and unforgiveness. Everyone is learning and is on different paths – respect that and move on. It’s only a matter of time before the universe delivers a man who values the Betty in you. 🙂

This post was inspired by Betty rants with a good friend, the new “Riverdale” tv series recommended by that friend, and Valentine’s Day.

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Make Valentine's Day More Meaningful

Teddy bears, chocolates, perfume and jewelry – it’s that time of year again!

For those who are single, the sentiment surrounding this holiday can very much be like the way it is depicted in this video (I admit I have been here many times):

For those who are in relationships, there might be pressure to make everything perfect for their special someone. I will always remember seeing a bunch of men in a drug store on Valentine’s Day, staring confusedly at the stuffed animals and chocolates on display. I laughed because they were obviously buying something last minute and looked genuinely stressed out about it. It struck me as odd – all that pressure on a day that was supposed to be about a light-hearted, loving energy.

I personally love Valentine’s day. I think it’s sweet that there’s a day dedicated to focusing on all the relationships in your life – not just romantic relationships. It’s also a wonderful time to focus on the relationship that you have with yourself.

Unfortunately, this day does have a tendency to turn some people into harsh self-critics. There are expectations, especially in the media (take Victoria’s Secret for example), about how women should look like and act on this day. Men can also face the same pressure – it just takes their partner to get googley-eyed at a shirtless Chris Hemsworth before their self-esteem plummets!

So it’s no surprise that Valentine’s day can invoke feelings of insecurity. It’s easy to feel like you may not be good enough or attractive enough for someone to be into you. You can also feel like you’ve lost the “spark” in your relationship as the years have gone by and there’s no way of infusing it with a renewed sense of love and passion.

If these thoughts are entering your head – your solar plexus is out of whack and needs some loving care and attention. This is the energy center that is associated with confidence, security and self-esteem. When it’s healthy, we’re happy with how we are and have a fully developed sense of self. The energy from this center feeds another energy center, the heart chakra, because when we have a strong sense of self-respect and self-esteem, it’s easier for us to love and appreciate ourselves, even with our flaws. If these energy centers are healthy, they can set strong foundation for your relationships and can even attract new (positive and healthy) ones to you.

I personally think the best Valentine’s Day involves letting go of all the pressure of how things should look like, including how you look or whether there’s a special someone on your arm. It should involve focusing on gratitude for all the relationships that you have in your life. You can then find ways of expressing that gratitude to those people– maybe it’s buying them a meaningful token present, cooking them a meal, or taking them out to their favourite restaurant. The day should be about focusing on celebrating your relationships in whatever way is comfortable and meaningful to both you and your loved ones.

Here’s a little reminder of the energy centers to focus on for healthy love & relationships:

Solar Plexus – confidence, self-esteem, self-respect, and self-control

Heart Chakra – love, gratitude, self-appreciation, romance, and humanity

Wishing you a heart-opening and meaningful Valentine’s Day! 🙂

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